Words Have Power
Often the process of naming something, just the act of putting it into words, lessens its power over us. When we are able to label our feelings, it becomes easier to deal with them. Part of my job is to help you verbalize your feelings, even ones you may not understand, recognize or even be aware that you have.
People often erect walls around themselves for protection. We can visualize therapy as opening windows and doors in those walls. I will respect your need to take care of yourself – we will never force or push you beyond your comfort zone. What I provide for you is a safe, caring and supportive place where you can risk lowering your protective walls. This will enable you to see new approaches to old problems and ways of thinking.
To move beyond the present place where you feel stuck, you need to understand your past. You may have developed survival skills that helped you deal with difficult or terrifying experiences earlier in your life. Although these skills helped you then, they may be interfering in your life now. Yet, to let them go may means changing lifelong behaviors and/or feeling very vulnerable. Our job together is to determine which of your skills are still useful and which have become baggage that weighs you down.
Once you understand how your past experiences affect you in the present, you may feel better about yourself and become more accepting of who you are. Therapy enables you to grieve for all your unmet needs in the past, so you can become who you want to be in the present.
Doing this work involves developing and building trust. I don’t expect you to immediately feel comfortable with me. However, as you recognize that I remain consistent, safe, and nonjudgmental, trust will develop one day at a time, session after session.